Up until this point, The 404 has tried to remain nonpartisan (untrue), never officially endorsing a candidate, but that rule is chucked out the window on today's show. It's a big announcement that's literally no surprise to anyone, but we make it anyway. Lots of election talk today, mostly about free corporate-sponsored junk food you can get for voting. We also talk about GPS chastity belts, marital affair enablers, and the best position to take while docking your iPod Touch. Wilson, you dirty birdy, you.
I had every intention of forcing you to listen to today's show for our official political endorsement, but screw it, I'm going to do it right here and now. The pundits at The 404 have unanimously decided that Professor Charles Xavier is the best hope we have for our nation's successful future. His not-for-profit work with our world's gifted youngsters prove his social skills, his political prowess, and ultimately his potential to be an extraordinary leader in these desperate times. It's time for a change, and we completely believe that Charles Xavier's innate telepathic powers can grab us by the coattails and pull us our of our eight-year rut. Too long has Erik "Magneto" Lensherr been allowed to employ his Brotherhood of Mutants at the political expense of our fair country. We need a juggernaut in the oval office, and Professor X is our man.
The 404 is delighted to support Professor Xavier and also very pleased to see him choose Peter Nikolaievitch Rasputin as his Vice President. Peter, or "Colossus" as we've come to know him through the years, has proven his executive talent, toughness, and ability to knock through several layers of brick time and time again. The Prof X/Colossus team is an unstoppable one and we're excited to see what they can do in 2009. If you care about the welfare of this nation, please cast your vote for Charles Xavier and Colossus today.
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